LOVE IS CARDINAL BUT LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH
Do not just invest in the future, do also invest for the future. A relationship needs a lot of love to stand; it also needs a lot of planning (inspired by the belief the couple have in the love they share) to sustain. This planning must derive from sacrifice, discipline, accountability, realistic expectations, and a firm belief in miracles.
Love doesn’t put food on the table… Money does. Yet it is love that fuels the desire, passion and resolve to work diligently in order to take care of your own.
Love inspires you to plan… Planning inspires you to invest for the future… Investments add value to the life you live in the future and protects you from the frustrations and disillusionment caused by the failings of the past.
Love is not eaten… It is experienced. It’s not food, it’s an emotion whose voice the heart longs to hear and whose presence the body longs to feel. Yet when the heart is filled with it, the stomach will still be empty, the bills still won’t be paid.
Live a balanced life… Don’t blame love for things your sacrifice, discipline and accountability could have taken care of. And believe in miracles, because sometimes even hard work cannot take you there…
Set your priorities right. One who allows himself or herself become distracted by love, is one who is capable of violating principles he is supposed to keep. There are certain boundaries we must not cross and it takes maturity and lots of discipline to know these boundaries and when it has become imperative to step on our brakes. Interestingly, we laugh at people who struggle with making sure that love doesn’t take more than it should, but this is a situation capable of happening to the best of us: From situations as simple as staying up beyond your designated sleep time chatting, that you wake up tired and sickly; to lying that you are sick just to stay off work or school, just so you can be with that person. It even gets more stupid, to defrauding your office so you can buy her a handbag or to give him money to add to his ailing business; or giving him your school fees in order for him to buy a spare tyre for his car.
Love should not be the reason for anyone to live a life that is not balanced. Love must not be blamed when we are unable to live the kind of life that will fetch us a more certain future, neither should the people we love be blamed for the challenges we end up struggling with when we misplace priority in the name of love.
Love is not enough. Love by itself is incapable of making a relationship work. So you must always ask yourself
- What are you capable of doing in the name of love?
- Those things you are capable of doing in the name of love, are they constructive or destructive to your future?
- Are you giving love more time than it deserves?
- If you are giving love more time than it deserves, to who or what does the time you are giving to love belong to?
- Do you see how the one or thing you are stealing time from (to give to love) suffering?
- What do you need to do in order to correct the situation?
- What do you stand to lose if you correct the situation?
Always remember, that anytime you violate a principle you know you ought to respect and keep, then love has become a distraction. Deal with it NOW before it destroys you.